Is 4 year college the right path for your student
Maybe….
Many parents are invested in a 4-year college path for their smart and quirky neurodiverse student. Attending a 4-year college may be the correct path. But there are many paths to 4-year college. And there are times that going to a 4-year college is not the right path.
You as a parent have to dynamically straddle the line between really seeing what your student is capable of vs reaching for the stars.
On the one hand you don’t want to set a student up for failure by pushing a 4-year college if the student really doesn’t want that option or doesn’t have the skills to navigate that successfully (even with supports in place).
But you also need to realize that our students grow and mature in fits and spurts and may have skills in 3 months you would dream they could have. They also may have skills they show the rest of the world which they don’t show you.
And, there are many paths to a fulfilling life, that may or may not include a 4-year college education.
So, my advice is to always keep all the options in the mix and work actively toward them all until it’s clear to your student that one won’t work out and/or the final decision has been made – this could include having a residential independent living support program, community college, Gap Year program, trade school, and/or 4 year college all ready to go and in play until a final option is decided on.
Finally, remember all this is our student’s decision, not ours. Even if you have concerns or fears about the decision (aside from real safety concerns) this is their decision to succeed at or to fail at. Our job as a parent is to consult and to support their path and choice (with some caveats that may take into account the time, effort, and financial support you are providing or will provide.)